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Saturday, March 7, 2009

FREE

I'm in the library right now. Primary reason why I wrote three post in one day lol. NEWAY The library has all glass walls so you're able to see outside. There is a bird that is somehow in the library. The bird keeps flying around in a panic and it keeps flying into the window. After experiencing the same result of not being able to go through the window, the bird is not giving up, it just keeps running into that window. So the custodian has tried to catch the bird but the bird wont keep still. Its natural reaction is to run away from humans of course. But reality is if the bird doesn't get out of this building its going to die, and if he would only allow the un-common to happen and submit to the custodian he would survive. I feel bad for the bird because the bird can clearly see all the other birds flying around outside and they are free and he is not. Not to mention its a baby bird. You get where I'm going?

That bird represents so many of us humans. We're in a situation that we don't even know how we got in it and that doesn't even matter because the biggest problem is we don't know how to get out of it. We're stuck. We see every one else living life having a good time, obviously they did something right because we're watching them wishing we were them. We keep repeating the same actions hoping for a different result but to no avail we're still stuck. Some of us don't even recognize we're repeating the same actions so its even harder for us to get free. It's natural for us to do things on our own and not ask for help. We're living our life in a panic, all over the place, stressed out about being stuck. If only we would relax and hand it over to God he could get his hand on us and set us free. Were fragile and were babies in our Christianity so we have no clue what to do. Time is ticking because a life lived in this manner might as well be considered the walking dead. If God doesn't get to us soon then surely disaster is on its way.

Little bird please be still and allow that custodian to catch you and set you free. You cant figure it out because it wasn't meant for you to figure it out. This is too complicated for you whether you're able to see it or not. I know you're scared, I know you think it would be crazy to let a human being get close, but that's just what you need baby bird cause you cant do it on your own. They want to help you, they want to set you free.

Dirty Mouth Women

Warning!!! This is a Rant!!! lol

How can such a beautiful, intelligent, queen, soft, precious, royalty and every other word that describes us as women, have such filthy mouths. A woman might be wondering why she cant get or keep a man and seriously speaking, her mouth might very well be the problem. It's common to have a potty mouth. I mean majority of us have parents with horrible mouths LOL and we crack up at them, but seriously this is not cute. Don't you feel weird when you're standing with your grandma or your mother and father and you hear a conversation that is full of a group of women or girls and they are using every word in the book. "No that B didn't" "Tell that H I'm not thinking about her" "His A didn't even make it, he full of S" Now take that same situation and imagine that when you're with your girls and yall are having fun and now some one is with their granny or pastor, or elder. Yup ladies, and I've heard plenty of men (not because of age but because of maturity and responsibility "real men") say that they will kick a chic to the curb in a heart beat because of her filthy mouth. So if you have a filthy mouth and you're wondering why you cant keep a man then try changing the way you talk, who knows maybe that's the problem. I know if I was a man I wouldn't be with a woman, no matter how cute she was with a mouth like a sailor. It's so unattractive.

Focused

Life is very interesting.
When you start living for all the right reasons and identify your purpose and actions to take to get to that purpose.
When you eliminate all the riff raff out of your life and obvious things that were holding you back.
Then all of a sudden problems begin to occur that you never even knew existed. This is proof that the devil is on his job trying his hardest to prevent you from getting to that promise land.
We'll go into some examples for further clarification. I have a testimony or two and so does my fellow friends about their attempts to focus on life.

Right now even at this very moment I have my plan down. I'm focused. I'm redrafting my short term and long term goals because I've matured as a woman and in my Christianity. After so many times of thinking I had it right, God continued to turn the zoom button on my eyes allowing me to see things much clearer. I've identified my purpose on being here on this earth and I identified my mission to live out that purpose.

Now with all these new found revelations and my new way of thinking, I'm assuming I'm on a role, life is going to get easier from here on out. HAHAHA lets just say life has gotten harder. I'm making people mad by not doing anything at all. Its like being in a relationship and your partner is already mad at something so when you do as much as smile at them they go off in a frenzy at you. I'm offending people by simply trying to focus and get my "grind on" with my dreams and goals. Man I didn't know that by me pressing the stop button on outside influences that I could cause so much strife. I realize that being a Christian doesn't mean solitude. Even I sometimes have feelings that "I'm alone" but I do realize that in order for me to get these things done, and in order to see the results, that I have to focus and concentrate. Which means I'm going to need a lot of alone time.

Actually I'm thinking that this is my form of punishment. You see some people take an early "right" path in life where they do the right thing from jump. They balance working and playing and don't give too much time to the other resulting in an even outcome. I respect those persons--they're lucky. Now me on the other hand, I've always been about play. All play and no work, which leads me to today. I'm not complaining, I'm taking my punishment in very well and I'm trying to work fast so that it can go away sooner. The slower I work the longer I'm going to be working.

Why cant people respect that? Why am I getting so much strife for simply wanting to be and live my life? I'm focused people, whether you believe my results to be possible is not up to you. Whether you believe in my dreams and goals are not up to you either. My life, my plans, my choices, are all up to God. T.I. and Rhianna said "Live your life" Why cant we all take that advice. I'm learning in this area too. I don't verbally express my feelings towards other people but I mentally do, so I'm learning to "Live my life" as well.

Another example.

A really good friend of mine is really going through it. She is loosing friends left and right because she has changed. She no longer wants to discuss the things she use to discuss or go to the places she use to go to. Shes' focused on following her dreams and now her friends are looking at her like she thinks shes too good.

Why don't we allow people to grow and change. How come we cant just say oh we've grow up and went separate ways. Is it because were hurt that the other person is doing something good? Is it because we're jealous? Why cant it be simple? Why does it have to be hard? Don't take it personal when a friend is going in an opposite direction. Respect that person and let them be.

It sucks for us who are trying to "focus" because we feel bad. We are separating ourselves from most people and majority of those people wont look at it in a respect way, they re going to look at it in a shes weird way, or shes too good way, or she changed on us. I want to tell people well if you think that about me then leave me alone already. But I can't and I won't. I want for these people who are in my life and my friend's life to see the results of a person who works hard and who focuses. I even want them to learn from my "all play and no work attitude" that landed me in this "all work and no play season."
And yes this is a season, because I am soon to reap the benefits of this hard work. I'm so close, I wont give up, I cant give up, It will prob get harder, it will prob get worse, but when its over..........

I'm focused